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NoleGameday

Weekly Trashbag: Syracuse Edition

Logan Stanford/Icon Sportswire

Welcome to the Weekly Trashbag where I tell you why Florida State’s next opponent is trash in one long sentence. Grammar is irrelevant and all hate can be directed @TreeNoleGameday on Twitter dot com. This will probably be a waste of your time, but hey, you’re on the internet.

SYRACUSE YOU ARE TRASH BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE LAZIEST TEAM NAME AND MASCOT IN ALL OF COLLEGE FOOTBALL I MEAN SERIOUSLY WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO PICK ORANGE BECAUSE I KNOW VERY WELL THAT THERES MAYBE ONE ORANGE FARM IN ALL OF NEW YORK AND ITS DEFINITELY NOT IN THE HARROWING CITY OF SYRACUSE, NEW YORK AND THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO ARE SCARED OF OTTO THE ORANGE (YES THATS THE MASCOTS NAME) ARE KIDS WHOS PARENTS MADE A BOOKING  ERROR FOR THEIR BIRTHDAY PARTY AND YOURE ALSO THE ONLY COLLEGE FOOTBALL PROGRAM THAT PLAYS IN A BASKETBALL STADIUM WITH AN INFLATABLE ROOF SO ITS BASICALLY JUST A BOUNCE HOUSE FOR OTTO AND DINO BABERS AT THE COLLEGE LEVEL IS A DISCOUNT WILLIE TAGGART, OR AS I LIKE TO SAY WAL-MART BABERS VS WILLIE TARGET AND I BET YOU WONT SCORE MORE THAN TWENTY-FIVE POINTS BECAUSE THE ONLY THING OFFENSIVE AT SYRACUSE IS THE UNIVERSITYS ENTIRE EXISTENCE UNLESS OF COURSE, YOU PUT OTTO THE ORANGE IN AT QUARTERBACK, BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE PRETTY OFFENSIVE TO CHILDREN EVERYWHERE, PARTICULARLY THOSE POOR YOUNG SOULS BEING PUNISHED BY HAVING TO SIT THROUGH A SYRACUSE HOME GAME AT THE BOUNCE HOUSE.


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